Winnipeg Wonderland

Just a little something I received via fax....

                            Winnipeg Wonderland

Aug 12	Moved to our new home in Winnipeg. It is so beautiful
	here. The prairies are so vast, can hardly wait to see
	the fields covered with snow. Love it here.

Oct 14	Winnipeg is the most beautiful place on earth. The leaves
	are all turned different cloours and shades of red and orange.
	Went for a ride through the beautiful farmland and saw
	some Deer. They are so graceful, certainly the most
	beautiful creature on earth. This must be paradise. I love it
	here.

Nov 11	Deer season starts soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to
	kill such a beautiful creature. Hope it will snow soon.
Dec 02	It snowed last night. Woke up to find it blanketed in
	white. It looks like a postcard. We went outside and
	cleaned the snow off the steps and shovelled the
	driveway. We had a snowball fight (I won) and when the
	snowplough came by, we had to shovel the driveway
	again. What a beautiful place. I love Winnipeg.

Dec 12	More snow last night. I love it, the snowplough did his
	trick again to the driveway. I love it here.

Dec 19	More snow last night. Couldn't get out of the driveway to
	get to work. I am exausted shovelling snow. Fucking snowplough.

Dec 22	More of that white shit fell last night. I've got
	blisters on my hands from shovelling. I think that snowplough
	hides around the curve and waits until I'm done shovelling the
	driveway. Asshole!

Dec 25	Merry Fucking Christmas!! More friggen snow. If I ever
	get my hands on that son of a bitch who drives that snowplough, I
	swear I'll kill the bastard. Don't know why they don't use more
	salt on the roads to melt the friggen snow.

Dec 27	More white shit last night. Been inside for 3 days,
	except for shovelling out the driveway every time the snowplough
	goes by. Can't go anywhere, car's stuck in a mountain of white
	shit. The weatherman says to expect another 10" of the shit again
	tonight. Do you know how many shovels full of snow 10" is?

Dec 28	The fucking weatherman was wrong. We got 34" of that
	white shit this time. At this rate it won't melt before next
	summer. The snowplough got stuck up the road and that bastard
	came to the door and asked to borrow my shovel. After I told him
	how I had broken six shovels already shovelling all the shit he
	pushed into my driveway, I broke my last shovel over his fucking
	head.

Jan 04	Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to
	get food and on my way back, a fucking deer ran out in front of
	the car and I hit it. Did about $3,000 damage to the car. Those
	fucking beasts should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed them
	all last November.

May 03	Moved to Alberta. I can't imagine anyone in their right
	mind that would ever live in the God forsaken province of Manitoba.